...of Living Intentionally

CTC Readers' Poll:
How Do You Want to Be Remembered

 In the April 1, 2009 issue of the newsletter, Counting the Cost editor Nancy Twigg asked readers this question:

"What would you like people to say about you at your funeral? How do you want to be remembered by those who knew and loved you?"

Responses:

"I would like them to say that they came to God because of the way that I
lived my life." ~ Anonymous


"Wow what a timely thought. We just found out a friend has been diagnosed with inoperable pancreatic cancer. He's lived his Christian life with great integrity. I know his neighbors, friends and family respect and love him for it, and when opportunity comes will say as much. Much like Barnabas, he's been an encourager and lifter of burdens. I hope as much can be said of us as we live our lives corum deo." ~ Anonymous



"Yes...this is a strange question!  But I have actually thought about this one! First and foremost, I would want people to remember that I had a great love for the Lord and His kingdom and that they will never forget some funny story or something that I did to make them smile. I have always told my friends that I would prefer it to be a celebration of my life!  I would want people to find my sons and grandchildren off to the side laughing and saying, 'Remember the time she...' and sharing something that we shared like the way when they were children I told each of my 2 sons, 'You are my favorite, but don't tell your brother!' They both grew up thinking they were the special one! And they were!" ~ Norma (Kentucky)


"I would like people to say something along the lines of this: Although not perfect or without fault, I did my best to be kind, helped others without seeking recognition, enjoyed life to its fullest, loved to laugh, never lost my inner child, and used my God-given talents to the best of my ability." ~ Liz

 
"She lead me to Christ. " ~ Sharon


"My brother passed away two weeks ago. His funeral was a great source of comfort. Over 300 people attended the funeral. My brother's career was in the food brokerage business and he assisted his son who is a high school baseball coach after retirement. He was very active in his church, serving as a deacon, teaching Sunday school, singing in the choir and filling in for the preacher when he went on vacation as a lay speaker. The pastor had a wonderful eulogy but the most touching part of the funeral was when the pastor opened up the floor for people to speak. My brother had touched many people in different ways. People who spoke included family, business associates, golfing buddies, former students of my nephew and church family. My niece and great niece are nurses and they told of how until the last two days before he passed away he ministered to the nurses and orderlies in the hospital and told them about his prayer quilt. My brother left a legacy of ministry and will always be remembered." ~Luann

"I didn't have to think about it. I know that all that matters to me is for people to say, 'She walked daily with the Lord Jesus.'  Beyond that I would want to be remembered as a loving, encouraging, sharing person who served others as a wife, mother, grandmother and Bible study small group leader.  I would also like people to remember that I was always available and willing whatever they need. Oh, yeah, and that I was a prayer warrior. That should be more than enough!" ~ Sandy


"My dad came from a poor, working-class family that had plenty of problems. He went to college on the GI Bill after he finished his stint in the Air Force–he became a mechanical engineer and the first person in his family to get a college degree. He went on to become the youngest plant manager ever in the Fortune 500 company he worked for–keep in mind he didn't finish college until he was 26. He became a senior vice president and was starting to think about retiring when he died suddenly and unexpectedly in 2003 at the age of 54.

Many, many people came to my father's wake and funeral and shared wonderful stories about him, how he was so funny and smart, so dedicated and very principled. But one lady shared the most special memory. She came very early the first day of his wake, before it officially started at 5:00, and no one but my mother and we kids were there yet. The lady introduced herself to us and said she was a security guard in my dad's office building–a huge building in downtown Chicago where thousands of people worked. She said she had just gotten off work and taken the bus to the funeral home (a bus ride of more than an hour in rush-hour traffic) and she couldn't stay long, she had somewhere else to be. But she wanted to meet my mother and tell her that of all the people who worked in that building, my father was the only one who learned her name and greeted her by name every day. Most people walked by her every day without seeing her at all.

My dad's company flew their company flag at half-mast for a day to honor my dad after he died. But what that lady said to us was the biggest tribute he got. I want to live my life so that someone says something like that about me to my children at my funeral." ~ Catherine in Minnesota


"After I die, I would like people to say that they could see my growth as a Christian through the years and even though I never reached perfection on earth, I could finally be at peace while made perfect through Christ my Savior in heaven." ~ Jenny


"What I want to be remembered for or what I want people at my funeral to say about me changes as I go through different phases of my life. Right now I would want people to say I always had a positive outlook on life. That I lived my life – as the Frank Sinatra song say, 'I did it my way.' That I wasn’t afraid to dance to the songs in my head. I was a good mother and a great friend. I want to hear, 'Welcome home, my good and faithful servant,' Then I know I will rest in peace. " ~ Theresa


"I would want them to say most of all that I was faithful. I would hope also a good wife and friend, and one who knew and communicated God's Word well." ~ Kay

"First of all, I have made it known to friends and family that I do not want flowers at my funeral. They don't do me any good, or any good to the friends or relatives, as they just have to take care of them and the flowers all eventually die. Flowers should be reserved for the living. If someone has a great desire to 'do something,' give money or time to your favorite charitable organization or one of mine.

Regarding what I want said at my funeral, I do not want family or friends speaking at my funeral. That is too hard on everyone; if there is a gathering afterwards, that is when memories can be explored. In fact, I have requested no funeral, just a graveside service. Everything that I want said can be said in the song, 'Find Us Faithful.' My favorite rendition is by Steve Green." ~ Chris 



"I would like to be remembered for my love of family and children. I have spent many years babysitting, running a licensed daycare, raising my own children, spending time with our nieces, nephews and great nieces and nephews, working at our local school in the lunchroom, playground, and after-school program, teaching Sunday School, and being a girl scout leader.
 
I would also like to be remembered for the love I gave my husband. He is a wonderful man and I am so lucky to have him. I show him my love by making him his favorite dishes and desserts, keeping the house clean, doing little things for him that he may not do for himself, helping him with whatever needs to be done. 
 
I would also like to be remembered as someone who was funny and liked a good April Fools joke." ~ Sandy

"I would like for people to say she fought a good fight and finished the race serving Jesus our Lord and Savior and she slid into the grave as if it were home plate saying, 'WOW, what a ride,' having enjoyed her life in many ways, Serving GOD, family and friends." ~ Linda



"More than anything I want them to say that I was a person who couldn't stop speaking about the Lord Jesus and the way of salvation through Him. That is my heart's desire, but I find myself getting caught up in the busyness of daily life caring for my family and home. Just in case I may have overlooked a family member or friend, I am planning to include a last sharing of the Gospel moment at my funeral. It is important for me to get my funeral planning done because this means so much to me. It's something currently on my To Do list." ~ Julie


"I always said that I want people to say that I made them laugh." ~ Barbara

"I'd like people to say that my children always knew how much I loved them and that I cared deeply about and took action to help the less fortunate members of my community." ~ Mary

"I believe the  two  most important things that my preacher can say about me is, 'She loved Jesus,' and 'She was a person who kept her word.'" ~ J Carol


"I am in my early 70's and have some serious health issues so the subject of funerals, mine in particular, come up often in my thoughts. I am in the process of writing my own obit, checking out funeral homes and my husband and I have even looked at caskets. That was hard but we didn't want our children to choose the most expensive one out of guilt. When I can't sleep at night -- I would say it has only been on a couple of occasions, I don't dwell on it -- I have thought what it would be like. I would love to believe that I would be nearby in spirit and could watch. I would imagine my friends saying that I was there for them. I listened to them and their problems, I helped them get a job they wanted or I held their hand during their time of need. In other words, I was their friend in need and I was a true lady and Christian." ~ Nell


"I had to share an idea my daughter came up with.   am an artist who does a few shows a year and her idea was when I die they would set up my 'booth' at the funeral and anyone who wanted to take a piece of art was welcome to have it. A great way to keep them from having too much of my stuff around and also to bless others (I hope, anyway!). 
 
This could be done with any collection that someone may have had that the heirs aren't interested in keeping. It could also create a huge cat fight...... but my hope would be a nice memento for folks to remember me by." ~ Heather

“She cared.” ~ Sue


"Nancy, I don't know if this will be appropriate for your newsletter but thought I'd pass it along just in case.

I recently made arrangements to give my body to science through Genesis  www.genesislegacy.org

They use your body for doctors to practice surgery (I would hope my Dr. has practiced before cutting on me!). I toured the facility and was very impressed. They were doing knee surgery the day I went. All the family has to do after your death is make one phone call to Genesis (after you haave signed up of course) and they take care of everything, even getting the death certificates for the family. They will ship the body to Memphis from anywhere in the USA. After they have finished all the surgeries they want to perform, your body is cremeated and the ashes will be shipped to the family if desired. They also make a donation of $600 for a memorial service or to the charity of the donor's choice. The family has absolutely no expense.

 

Editor's Note: Thanks to these readers who took time to write!

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